Ayleen Charlotte: Breaking Down the Shame and Taboo of Fraud
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Stefanie Hallgren
ACFE Public Relations Specialist
“How would you feel if your worst life experience was broadcasted by Netflix globally? Well, that happened to me.”
Ayleen Charlotte, fraud victim turned hero, started off her keynote address at the 2023 ACFE Fraud Conference Europe with the story that thrust her into the spotlight — a romantic tryst with a man she later learned was a convicted fraudster. Her romantic past — an emotional roller coaster and whirlwind romance, turned negative mental states, turned sweet revenge plot — was the subject of the 2022 Netflix documentary, “The Tinder Swindler,” watched by people across 200 countries around the world.
“I didn’t want to keep this story to myself, and that is why I’m here today — to share my journey with you.”
Despite all the setbacks Charlotte encountered in her post-fraud story, she continuously reaffirmed that there were reasons why she wanted her story out there. She said, first, she “want[ed] to break down the shame and the taboo of fraud.” Second, she wanted “government agencies, banks, companies to learn from my story and to change policies to detect and prevent fraud, but also how to deal when an actual fraud victim is getting in contact with you.” Finally, “she want[ed] to inspire and motivate victims of fraud and abuse to not take no for an answer and step up.”
“Did you know that only 7% of scams are reported? I am fighting to increase this number because the devastating impact of fraud can bring permanent mental damage and feelings of shame,” Charlotte said. “And even worse, it can also cost lives. If it’s up to me, this really needs to stop. How about you? Ending up in a massive fraud isn’t only on an individual basis. Fraud impacts all layers of our society.”
“A Real Prince on a White Horse”
Charlotte’s love story with convicted fraudster Simon Leviev started like any other Tinder user’s free time — she was swiping on the dating app and found a match. She found Leviev, who, she said, “comes from Israel, is funny, very smart, charming and well-presented.”
For Charlotte, and many others who might see Leviev on paper, he was a golden catch.
Charlotte said after a few weeks of chatting with Leviev, she was in London for a work trip and realized he was in town as well. Leviev wanted to take her out for a drink one night, but Charlotte was feeling tired. They agreed to meet the next morning for coffee on the way to one of Charlotte’s meetings for work.
“When we talk, I feel that I finally found my match,” Charlotte said. “I feel very comfortable with him, and that’s something I’ve never felt with a guy before.”
Charlotte said Leviev quickly took an interest in all aspects of her life. “He really puts me on a pedestal. A real prince on a white horse. In time, I am totally falling in love with him.”
Henceforth, Charlotte and Leviev saw a lot of each other and had fun on various outings. Leviev quickly became “the perfect boyfriend,” and continued to shower Charlotte with love “and a lot of flowers.”
"I've never received so many flowers in my life," she chuckled.
“Why would I not trust him?”
Leviev was involved in a dangerous situation — or so Charlotte thought. Leviev said he was the CEO of a diamond company called LLD Diamonds, which put him in a precarious state with several enemies. This is what began to turn the tide in the couple’s whirlwind romance. Charlotte said she received a desperate call from Leviev after he said, “he lost a big business deal and enemies [were] chasing him more than ever, and if they couldn’t catch him, they will come to me.” To keep his whereabouts under the radar, Leviev said he needed a safe place to live and a credit card not under his name. Charlotte convinced Leviev to move in with her to keep them both safe, and she also let him borrow her credit card. He sent her a check to cover the expenses incurred and continued to reassure Charlotte that she would get her money back.
“Of course, I believe him,” said Charlotte. “Why would I not trust him? He’s already my boyfriend for over 10 months.”
But too much time passed before Charlotte got her money back, and she thought she needed some supplemental income. She “took out two personal loans of 30k each.” A few months later, Charlotte was broke, but she continued to feel the pressure from Leviev to acquire more funds. At one point, he urged her to sell her house and car so they could get more money — a request that shocked Charlotte, a young woman who prided herself on her independence.
As Leviev’s stories took a much more unbelievable turn and his pressuring continued, Charlotte’s mental health began to suffer. “Fear, anxiety and a constant feel of anger, and a lot of sleeping problems,” said Charlotte.
Scrolling to “The Tinder Swindler”
After the couple hadn’t seen each other for a while, they met in Prague, where Charlotte said Leviev was distracted. She said any bit of the amazing chemistry the couple had had practically disappeared, and he still had no answers for the lost money. After that meeting, Charlotte didn’t think she would ever see Leviev again. But, as she was waiting on the plane to leave Prague and scrolling through Instagram, she saw Leviev in her feed. He was connected to an article from Norway that was titled, “The Tinder Swindler.” She learned that Leviev had been dating two other women who were also being taken for their money.
Charlotte began to put it all together in her mind and, despite the initial gut punch, she decided to fight back. “Deep down inside me, there is a very strong woman,” she said. “I start climbing up. Everything falls into place.”
Charlotte started thinking about her relationship with Leviev, the patterns of what happened and how she could connect it to the modus operandi of many fraudsters. “They work very hard to gain your trust and to make you emotionally depend[ent] on them. Then, they create opportunities to build up pressure and fear, and eventually, there is a crisis to make you want to support and rescue them. And this repeats itself over and over again until you’re completely empty, as a person but also your wallet. By the time you’re no longer usable, they disappear. They don’t care about you as a person. They only care about themselves and their financial wins.”
Looking back, she realized the pressure Leviev put on her to get money for his situation was probably the biggest red flag. Not only had he asked for money by calling and texting her on his cell phone, but Leviev also called Charlotte’s work phone, as well as her colleagues, to build that pressure.
Climbing Up and Climbing Out
Ultimately, Charlotte climbed out of her dire situation “not as a victim, but as an activist for justice,” thanks to a strong support system, something she recommends for any victims of fraud, or any other kind of abuse. Charlotte said her support system helped her deal with the aftermath of fraud, which included feelings of “shame, disbelief, sadness, anger,” but her anger and desire to fight back took over. “I wanted to let my abuser and fraudster know that he really messed with the wrong woman. I wanted to stand up for everybody that he defrauded.”
Charlotte exacted revenge on Leviev with the help of his collection of expensive designer clothes — which she later sold to help recoup her financial losses — and his fake passport name, which she happened to know and shared with police, along with much more evidence. When Leviev flew into Athens, Greece, he was arrested.
“Unfortunately for me and all his victims after 2010, he could only be arrested for having a fake passport,” Charlotte said. “And when he was sent back to Israel, he could only be convicted for outstanding charges from 2010.” To date, Leviev hasn’t been charged for any of the alleged crimes he committed after 2010. However, Charlotte says she is pleased that Leviev’s face is out there.
Charlotte realized that the most painful part of this entire process was when she tried to report the crime. “Most of the organizations that should stand beside you against fraud don’t know what to do when an actual victim gets in touch,” she said. “Even listening to the story can make a lot of people feel uncomfortable,” so she, unfortunately, couldn’t get any help from these organizations. She said her story wasn’t taken seriously because these organizations said she gave away her money on her own.
“Being a victim and being victimized made me twice a victim,” she said. “I needed to be part of the documentary after three years of not having any help or any guidance from the police … to have organizations listen to me.”
Charlotte commended organizations for their efforts to prevent fraud and spread anti-fraud education, but she said empathy for fraud victims is key. Charlotte called on these organizations to have plans in place for victim support, with “answers, guidance and real action”, to not blame the victims, but to blame the criminals, and to give fraud victims “the same support, understanding and guidance as victims of any other crimes at all levels.”
"By blaming the victims of fraud, we let the criminals win," she said.
In a Q&A session led by Deloitte Forensic Partner, Stacey Toder Feldman, Charlotte was asked if there was anything she wished had gone differently in the fraud reporting process. Charlotte said she had Google searched Simon Leviev’s name many times during their relationship, but she couldn’t find any red flags or police reports about him. There was no consistent database for police reports, but she later learned that Leviev had criminal history in Sweden, Germany, the U.K., Israel, Spain and Norway.
When asked about any advice she would give to victims of fraud or any other abuse, Charlotte returned to the importance of a support system of family members and friends. “Maybe if you already shared your story with a loved one or someone you trust, then maybe it will be easier to also go to the police, and maybe they are also willing to go with you to the police.”
“This is like a tremendous, big mountain to step over,” she said. “If you once did it, it will only get better. It is also a really good way of healing as well.”
Charlotte went on to say she wishes dating apps would do a little more to stop romance scammers. She said scammers are likely making many more matches than the average person, so that should be a red flag for these apps’ technology.
When asked if she got back on Tinder to find love, Charlotte admitted she did, but she got bored on the app and is not currently active on it. She shared three tips to prevent dating app users from becoming fraud victims:
If a potential match wants you to hop off the app and continue communication elsewhere, don’t do this if you’re not ready for this. If they can’t respect your wishes, then they’re not for you.
Never give money or an investment if they are someone you just met online.
If the match is “love bombing you too much, try to step back.” Wait a bit to respond to messages instead of immediately, which will help you see what this person’s intentions are.
Above all, Charlotte recommended listening to your gut feeling.
A virtual conference attendee asked Charlotte about if, and how, she can trust people again after her experience with Leviev. She admitted that she went to therapy, and ultimately, she decided to move forward after this experience and trust again.
“If I cannot trust people anymore or if I would love differently or if I would see my friends in a different way or if I’m getting connected with new people in a different way, then the fraudster has taken more than my money,” she said. “Because then he’s also taking my life, and that’s something I don’t want to give him … Of course, I became more aware, and my eyes are more open, and I’m a little bit more careful, but I still want to love again and be who I am, because I don’t want to change myself for him and because of him.”
